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when you let your lust control you as a man when you don't know how to attract women you have a girlfriend and you pay for sale

💨 tl;dr

Stop blaming others; take charge of your life. Paying for affection shows low self-respect. Focus on self-improvement instead of superficial stuff. Real change takes effort, so don’t be lazy.

💡 Key Ideas

• Dismissing the 'devil and angel' concept; personal responsibility is key.
• Considering arrangements like sugar daddy dynamics reflects deeper self-image issues.
• Paying for affection shows a lack of self-respect and poor decision-making.
• High financial status is subjective; making $100k isn't rich, highlighting middle-class struggles.
• Spending money on superficial things (like sex or excessive photo shoots) instead of self-improvement is misguided.
• Engaging in unhealthy relationship patterns can ruin future prospects.
• Importance of self-respect and dignity in relationships can't be overstated.
• Real change requires effort; taking the easy route leads to negative consequences.

🎓 Lessons Learnt

• Don't Pay for Attention: Paying for a girl's bills shows desperation and can ruin relationship dynamics.

• Work on Yourself First: Focus on self-improvement—physically, socially, and emotionally—rather than relying on money to attract women.

• Realistic Self-Assessment: Know your own attractiveness and financial situation; just being 'okay' isn't enough to attract someone you really want.

• Invest in Yourself: Prioritize personal growth and education for better opportunities and fulfillment over superficial pursuits.

• Stop Being a Simp: Avoid being overly submissive or desperate in relationships; recognize your own worth.

• Don't Let Lust Control You: Exercise self-control and don’t let desires dictate your actions, especially in relationships.

• Seek Help for Addictions: Acknowledge problems and seek support to prevent further damage to your life and relationships.

• Put in Effort: Actively work on improving yourself instead of taking shortcuts for life changes.

• Become What Women Want: Focus on self-improvement to be the type of man that women desire, rather than settling for less.

🌚 Conclusion

To avoid ruining your life, invest in yourself, know your worth, and don’t let lust control you. Be the man women want by working on your personal growth and ditching unhealthy patterns.

In-Depth

All Key Ideas

Speaker's Reflections on Personal Experiences and Self-Improvement

• The speaker questions the idea of having a 'devil and angel' on your shoulder, dismissing it as nonsense.
• The speaker shares a personal experience of meeting a woman at a club and offering to help her with her bills.
• The conversation reveals that the speaker is essentially considering a sugar daddy arrangement.
• There's a critique of the speaker's decision to pay for affection instead of improving himself to attract women.
• The speaker acknowledges he is not in great shape, despite claiming to work out, and is not receiving compliments on his physique.
• The discussion highlights that making $100k a year is not considered rich, framing the speaker's financial status as middle class.
• The speaker is taking steps to improve, like going to school and taking creatine, but struggles with self-image and dating issues.

Discussion on Self-Respect and Relationships

• A man considers paying a woman $900 to sleep with her, which raises questions about his self-respect and decision-making.
• The conversation critiques the idea of valuing women solely based on their physical appearance and the implication of paying for sex.
• There’s a concern about setting a poor example for potential future children by engaging in such behavior.
• The discussion emphasizes the importance of self-respect and dignity in adult relationships.
• The man has never done a personal photo shoot but is willing to spend money on sex, highlighting a disconnect in priorities.

Reflections on Relationships and Self-Improvement

• Spending $900 on a photo shoot is seen as excessive when the money could be better invested in self-improvement.
• A woman who charges for sex is not considered 'high quality' by the speaker.
• The conversation reveals a lack of self-control and unhealthy patterns in relationships, including paying for sex while in a relationship.
• The speaker suggests that this behavior can ruin a person's future and relationships.
• The need for self-reflection and potential spiritual guidance is emphasized, particularly through church.

Life Advice

• Change your life around starts with effort.
• People don't want to put in effort to become the man women want.
• Riding the easy path leads to painful consequences.

All Lessons Learnt

Advice on Attracting Women

• Don't Pay for Attention: Offering to pay a random girl’s bills to get her attention is not a smart move. It shows desperation and can lead to unhealthy dynamics in relationships.
• Work on Yourself First: Instead of relying on money to attract women, focus on improving yourself—physically, socially, and emotionally.
• Realistic Self-Assessment: Understand where you stand in terms of attractiveness and financial success. Just being 'okay' in those areas won't cut it if you want to attract someone you find truly appealing.
• Education and Growth Matter: Continuing education and self-improvement can lead to better opportunities and personal growth, which are more fulfilling than superficial pursuits.

Advice on Self-Respect and Personal Growth

• Stop being a simp.
• Think about your decisions.
• Lead by example for your future kids.
• Invest in yourself instead.
• Recognize your worth.

Advice on Relationships and Self-Control

• Don't let lust control you: It's important to have self-control and not let your desires dictate your actions, especially when it comes to relationships.
• Invest in yourself instead of paying for sex: Spending money on experiences like photo shoots can help you attract better partners rather than wasting it on temporary pleasures.
• Recognize the value of relationships: If you're willing to pay for sex while in a relationship, you need to reassess what you're doing and what you truly value in a partner.
• Seek help if you have an addiction: Acknowledging that you have a problem is the first step; seeking support or guidance can help prevent further damage to your future.

Self-Improvement Tips

• Put in Effort: Change your life by actively working on yourself instead of taking the easy way out.
• Become What Women Want: Focus on self-improvement to be the kind of man that women desire, rather than settling for a lackluster approach.